As a stereotype, the "Ugly American Tourist" takes a healthy beating worldwide-and for good reason. There are few things harder on the eyes and ears than a cranky, chunky traveler whining about why he can't get any "normal" food or why his hotel room is "so small."

But to be fair, "Ugly Tourists" come in all nationalities. I live 20 minutes from San Francisco, a city in which millions of visitors leave their hearts each year. (Of course, being a liberal city we have an ordinance on exactly where those hearts can be left and we tax them for every day they are left unclaimed.) And trust me my friends, I have seen seriously Ugly Tourists from every corner of the globe.

So the Ugly American Tourist has nothing on the Ugly German Tourist, and the Ugly German Tourist is well matched by the Ugly Japanese Tourist. We all have our little cultural quirks, and to say that one group is more ugly than the next is purely subjective.

There is one exception to this rule: The Ugly Cruise Ship Tourist. It's not a question of culture or style or even personal hygiene, it's a question of mass-and in this case I'm not talking about body mass. I'm talking about en masse, as in the way Ugly Cruise Ship Tourists descend on their various ports of call.

Now, before you cruise-ship fans and cruise line public relations directors start writing angry emails, let me say that I realize that the average cruise ship carries 3,000 passengers. So there really is no other way to descend other than en masse. I get it.

But do you realize that for what you spend on a cruise you could—particularly if you got together with five or six other couples—charter a private yacht with a full crew?

That's the premise of Kim Kavin's book, "Dream Cruises: The Insider's Guide to Private Yacht Charter Vacations." The charter editor for Yachting magazine, former editor in chief of Voyaging magazine and former cruising editor for Power & Motoryacht magazine, Kavin knows what she's talking about.

"In many cases, a family of four will pay less for a charter than they would for a cruise-ship vacation," writes Kavin, who contributes the bi-weekly column, "The Yacht Insider" to Boats.com and started the Charterwave website in 2006. "Even couples used to traveling on board high-end cruise ships can find comparable bargains when cruising on board private yachts with their friends."

David Rohr, product manager for The Moorings Power (a division of TUI Marine), which charters new-generation 37- and 47-foot power catamarans, agrees. But he says there's even more to it.

"The deal may be the same, but hands down the experience is much, much better," says Rohr. "That's what we hear from our customers."

Van Perry handles the sailing side of The Moorings, which reportedly has the largest fleet of charter catamarans in the world, as well as mono-hulls. Perry says that customers who come from the cruise- ship world are consistently impressed with private charters-from all sides of the equation.

"They're very surprised at what a value it is, particularly as they're on their own "˜personal cruise ship,'" he says. "On our 65-foot catamaran, there are accommodations for up to ten passengers, and the crew includes a captain, a chef and a first mate. All food and alcohol are included. Because the yacht is their travel platform, it is equipped with kayaks, windsurfing gear, fishing gear and snorkeling gear. We repeatedly hear from customers what an incredible value amount of value there was for the amount of personal attention they received."

For the record, I've never been on a cruise ship. I hate crowds and cruise directors and bartenders named Issac so-you do the math-it just won't happen. But I have been on a few yachts, and to borrow from Dudley Moore in the movie Arthur, "It doesn't suck."

And I'm pretty sure I looked beautiful on those boats. At least that's what the small, dedicated crew was paid to tell me.

Written by: Matt Trulio
Matt Trulio is the co-publisher and editor in chief of speedonthewater.com, a daily news site with a weekly newsletter and a new bi-monthly digital magazine that covers the high-performance powerboating world. The former editor-in-chief of Sportboat magazine and editor at large of Powerboat magazine, Trulio has covered the go-fast powerboat world since 1995. Since joining boats.com in 2000, he has written more than 200 features and blogs.